WARNING: This blog contains conversations about my life. It can be cruel but it's the truth from the way I percive it. I don't always use nice words and sometimes I share a little bit too much. I don't put on a happy face in the midst of hard times because that's what inspires others. If you have an issue please navigate away from this page now.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Throwing Caution to the Wind!

Over the last few weeks I'v heard my Pastor say the simplest of statements. "God will pay for it" "God always pays" I look at Pastor Chris like yeah right. In my head I'm giving him doubts. 'Come on Chris there isn't anyway God is just going to come up with enough money for B and I to pay our bills and then pay off our debts and still get me to Califoria for a visit in October. Thats too soon and plane ticket prices are rediculous, plus I'd need a hotel and San Diego area is expensive.'

When God has plans for you boy does he deliver. I think he delivered in my case because I had no faith that it would happen and he just wanted to teach me a lesson. Chris was talking that same morning about how we all should throw out the pro and con lists. Let God guide our lives. In every other way I had tried to do that. Except when it came to bills I couldn't trust that "God paid" Until I was checking funds and prices and figured out last night I could afford to go see my wonderful husband for his birthday. One happy woman right here!!! I have to tell my work about it and I have to tell them soon because I am leaving next Wednesday. Very soon but the pieces to the puzzle just fit so perfectly. God paid.

What's even better is the timing couldn't have been better this month. B and I are unoffically trying to create life-since we know that being apart throws a wrench in the trying part. And according to life's cycle his birthday is supposed to be "the most" fertile day for me. Now I know not to get my hopes up because it doesn't always happen the way the calender thinks it should. If nothing happens this month then it isn't meant to be right now. We are fine with that because we are young. We decided to start young because we don't want to be old parents and because I have issues with my reproductive system. I am going to have a very hard time getting pregnant so I figured why wait.? LOL Why delay the process. We have to have been trying for at least 1 year before the doctor's will even think of helping out -because we are young.

I've never been on a plane though. I'm kind of nervous. I will be traveling over 4000 miles on my very first trip and I'll be doing it all alone. I don't do well being alone and I hardly trust anyone. I'm always looking over my shoulder so I'm sure I wil be on edge almost the entire time until I'm in the arms of my husband. The day I get there is his duty day, so that will kinda suck. But, I will manage. I'll go shopping or something. =]
I will post on the trip when I'm back for sure if I don't post before then.


  1. J had never been on a plane until he left for Great Lakes. You'll be fine! Just make sure to bring gum to chew so your ears don't pop :).

    But yeah, I know about the 'trying' part. I'm supposed to be ovulating during PIR weekend, and we've been trying for about 5 months. I also have a history of ovarian cysts, so our biological clock is ticking a lot faster than what we thought.

    But just when you think you have nothing figured out, things just kind of tend to fall into place right when you need them to :). Safe travels, have fun, and make a baby damnit!

  2. Thats good to know about the gum, I won't forget it. It's also nice to know that I'm not alone on the urge to try as soon as possible. lol I am praying for a miracle on baby news.